


i'll find you another time

by halfwindsor



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Captain America: The Winter Soldier Spoilers, Gen, M/M, Sam Wilson is awesome, Team Dynamics, soldiers angsting at each other mournfully
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-05
Updated: 2014-04-05
Packaged: 2018-01-18 06:26:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1418342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfwindsor/pseuds/halfwindsor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>spoilers/coda to the end of ca:tws - no one tells steve that sacrifice tastes like saltwater.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i'll find you another time

**Author's Note:**

> so i wanted to write a steve centric coda to the end of ca:tws. this ended up being team fic focusing on the events after the film with a layer of stucky and oops i regret nothing? i can't write angst properly. angst how does it work.

Steve’s ears begin to hurt.

There’s a sharp pressure pressing itself against his temple. His lungs heave, straining for breath and his mouth fills with the salt water. Below him the light dances with the currents and darkness. It’s beautiful in the way familiar things are. He can’t tell the bottom of the Potomac from the Arctic at this distance.

He’s always believed in doing the right thing. To always stand by what you believe in and sacrifice yourself for a cause. No one tells Steve that sacrifice tastes like saltwater.

He closes his eyes wondering if he’ll open them in another time.

(He is too far gone before he feels the metal hand grip his uniform by the back of his collar and drag him up to shore.)

\---

It’s the first time Steve has been in a hospital since the serum.

The rush of footsteps moving back and forth; the way things just seem sterile and cleaner and the way the lights are always too bright. It reminds Steve of his mom. He’d drop by and check on her on late nights. Sometimes, when his lungs or his heart would act up, he’d spend a night or two on a bed like this.

He’s aching everywhere. His knee feels stiff. He wonders slightly if he’s back in his old body. Like, the serum’s just gonna run out one day. He snaps back to reality when he notices there’s music. A couple songs he doesn’t recognize to his right and Sam reading a book on his left.

The impact between Bucky’s metal fist and his jaw is enough to bruise him, so grinning at Sam hurts.

“On your left.”

\---

S.H.I.E.L.D is gone.

Nick Fury is in the wind, and as far as the public is concerned is six feet under. He drops by New York because Tony Stark sent his hospital room flowers and Steve’s got manners. Best to thank people in person. It also helps that if anyone knows how to find a guy this century, it’s Tony.

(Steve takes his bike. He asked Sam if he wanted a ride in the back-seat, the look of utter disbelief was worth the punch to his bruised shoulder. Sam will fly there, thank you very much. Steve thinks he means that he’s going to take a plane until, a shadow looms above him on the free way and yells: on your left.)

He waits at the lobby of Stark Tower.

He should have called ahead really. As he’s learning, you can’t exactly just walk into the New York Office and demand to see their CEO. Even if you’re Captain Rogers and you’ve just saved the world. Guy, at the door, Happy - he damn well tells Steve that security around here is tighter than ever.

He’s playing this game called ‘Cut the Rope’ on his mobile phone, before someone clears their throat.

“Captain Rogers,” the voice says. “Mr. Stark would like to see you now.”

Steve stops in his place to see a familiar man in a suit.

“Coulson -, you’re not dead,” Steve says a little dumbly because people-being-brought-back-to-life seems to the theme of his life for the week.

“Yes, I gathered that,” is the dry reply. Steve shakes his hand, a little star struck as he gets ushered into a private elevator.

“Hill has a bigger office than I do. Which is hilarious considering I applied two hours before her,” Coulson pauses. “Oh, and I’m sorry about Jasper. I never knew.”  
  
Coulson presses his thumb on a keypad and enters a passcode. Jarvis’ voice fills the elevator and tells them that Mr. Stark is expecting them upstairs.

“Two years, and you couldn’t manage a postcard?” Steve asks.

“I don’t think this is in Hallmark’s scope, Captain.”

  
\---

“And this,” Tony gestures to a room with a mural of an eagle and a holographic American flag fluttering in the centre of it all, “is where you’ll be staying.”

Steve is torn between punching Tony in the jaw or bursting into laughter. He settles for the second, cracking up until his ribs hurt and he has to hold the door to hold him still. With everything that’s been going on, it’s a nice change from the sympathy and the rush of things.

“Stark, I got a few objections to the decor,” he says sternly as he places his bag on George Bush bedsheets. “But, thank you for the invitation.”

“Mi casa es su casa, el Capitan,” Tony finishes with a salute. “Seriously, though. Su casa. You might wanna look in moving in permanently. It’ll centralize security. With AIM, Aliens in London and Hydra out; I really think the world could use it if we could mobilize quicker. Besides Banner and Barton have already said yes. So, really, we’re just waiting on you, thunder thighs and killer thighs.”

“Hawkeye’s moved in already?” Steve asks. Clint’s taken time off. A year in SHIELD probation for attacking the helicarrier and a few more months in LA - so Steve’s gathered from his Vines. It’s a healing process and Norse Gods pack a doozy when they mess with your subconscious. With SHIELD being in pieces, he’s glad to know that Clint’s found himself with people he can trust.

“Oh yeah, him and his new coat are really rocking the Panem look,” Tony grins.

“Considering, Nick Fury kinda died in my last apartment - yeah, the idea of moving in sounds great, Tony. I’ve got a couple of things to do first. I need help finding a friend.”

“The Winter Soldier,” Tony says easily. He taps his temple once. “I did a little precursory hacking during the livestream of what was going down in DC. Is he going to be something to worry about?”

“I dunno yet. The guy I know wouldn't cause us trouble, but I'm not sure how much of him left is the guy, I know,” Steve answers. There’s distress marked clear on his face. Concern marring his features.

“His name was Bucky. I want to help him in anyway I can,” Steve pauses, “Now, I know Bucky and If there’s anywhere he’s gonna be, it’s here in New York. Workin’ on a hunch but hopefully, that’ll get us somewhere.”

“I’ll go tell Jarvis to print flyers with your number at the bottom. Wanted Assassin Who’s Secretly A War Hero from the 40s. 200 dollar cash reward.”

Steve makes a face until he hears Tony tell Jarvis something about ‘Dad’s old films’ and ‘facial recognition’.

\---

  
Since the ice, he’s avoided coming here. Brooklyn just harbors too much memories of a life he’s lost. 70 years shapes even the roads differently, and while there are some structures that are the same - its people, noise and shops are different. It even smells cleaner.

He moved all the way to DC to forget, and somehow - he’s here again. Where it all started. There’s a corner down on this avenue where he got beat up and now it’s just an empty alleyway.

“This was our building,” he tells Sam.

“Third floor,” he points upward. Takes a few paces to the left of the building. “That, over there used to be Bucky’s room. When his sister left for boarding school, he was really upset. We were about eight, I think. His dad was on tour. The Barnes’ were always in the military, it’s something that got passed down - you know. Buck didn’t even think twice about enlisting. Turns out, Buck doesn't like staying home alone. He made me stay and sleep on couch cushions. Mom used to work nights but really, it was better for both of us.”

\---

“Aww, Triskelion,” Clint says as he’s watching the news footage in the Avengers common.

They’re still replaying and theorizing about what exactly happened in DC. Natasha’s press conference didn’t make things any smoother.

(And I thought I gave bad press conferences, Tony says in the background as they watch Nat storm off.)

Sam, somehow manages to get along really well with everyone. Like, he’s been an Avenger from the very start. It takes about twenty minutes before he calls Tony out and manages to hold his place with Clint’s banter. He also helps Bruce do the dishes after they get Thai food so Steve can cross it off his list.

They’re all kind of mellowed out, drinking beers by Tony’s TV while Sam and Steve give their play-by-play on what really happened in DC.

“You know, if you moved upward about twenty degrees that could have been avoided,” Cap motions at the screen. Tactics has always been his forte, not the fight.

“He always does this,” Bruce says dryly. The look Sam gives him is one of understanding. Sam gets it more than anyone. He reviews what happened in Afghanistan in his head more than he should. He thinks things like, if I had gone another way - would Riley have walked outta there alive? So, he can tell that Steve’s doing the same as he watches Steve analyze the battle.

“Course he does, he’s the Captain.” Sam grins. “First time saving the world. Think I got them pretty good.”

“There’s always next time,” Clint replies. “We should set you up with an intensive workout routine. I’ll ask Natasha for hers.”

“That is, if you want there to be a next time.” Tony pipes up. “Superheroics tends to be a full time responsibility.”

“Am I being asked to be an Avenger?” Sam asks incredulously. “This really happening?”

“Yeah, I need Tony to run out of bird jokes. We can split them 50/50,” Clint retorts grimly.

Steve laughs, “That’s just going to encourage him to double the efforts.”

\---

Bruce is showing him some research on the serum that Hydra could have tried on Bucky. He’s explaining the intricacies of Zola’s process and where he could have gone wrong. No one knows how far you can go with the serum better than Bruce, after all.

(Bucky, Bruce muses, seems to have gotten a better deal.)

They’re talking shop. Bruce is explaining the science behind Erskine’s formula. Dissecting Steve down to every atom, when Jarvis informs them that they’ve found a match.

Security feed from the Smithsonian places a figure with Bucky’s face staring at his own display for an hour and a half. Unmoving. Steve wonders what he’s thinking.

Jarvis is tracking his movements then and Steve, hangs on to every electronic word until they pinpoint his current location, and there’s something that tastes like bile that rises up his throat when he sees the coordinate. He tries to bolt out the door, but then Bruce hulks out and sets off at least six alarms in the tower.

“SPANGLES STAYS UNTIL METAL MAN COME.”

\---

Steve hates it.

This is protocol they follow with Doctor Doom, with terrorists and robbers. Sam Wilson hangs back ready to strike from above. Tony is suited up, repulsors aiming at Buck and muttering a signal into the communication unit. He can’t even see Clint, but he can just assume that he’s got a finger on the arrow, ready to pull.

This is protocol they follow when they deal with villains.

His shield is tucked away and forgotten for now, but Steve’s not the only one still in civvies. Bucky’s hair is in a ponytail. A cap on his head and a coat that’s two sizes too big. He looks almost inconspicuous.

Steve’s the one who raises his hands up, “I’m a friendly.”

“Are they?” is the dry retort that follows from the other man. There’s something haunting about Bucky’s look. His mouth is drawn in a thin line. He looks clammier and paler illuminated by the light of the Cyclone. It makes all the sense in the world to Steve that Bucky would come here.

“They here to put the Winter Soldier at rest?”

“We’re here to help you,” Steve pleads.

He’s Captain America - and he’s supposed to be the one with the courage that never falters. The one with the knee that never bends. Now all he is raw desperation. All he is need.

“I don’t even know who _you_ is.”

Steve gives the signal to stand down.

 _tbc_. 

**Author's Note:**

> update next saturday. maybe i'll just write porn. this is ridic. 
> 
> also hi i'm half-windsors in tumblr if you wanna come say hi!


End file.
